I want to continue to discuss the idea of New Year’s resolutions in my column.
To be frank, I have always had mixed emotions about goal setting exercises, and establishing end of year resolutions. I don't necessarily think that goal setting is wrong. I know from experience that it can be a powerful tool to help you move from "the dream" to "the reality".
New Year's resolutions are a little bit like a reset button on your technology devices. They can help you recalibrate, and reset your purpose-drive.
Yet, I deal with a constant stream of driven and purposeful people in my leadership coaching sessions, who struggle with their goals, and resolutions!
The US based Statistic Brain Research Institute that is used by about three million people monthly, indicates that in 2017, 44.3% of New Year’s resolutions were to do with self-improvement or education; 42.1% were money related; and unsurprisingly, 32.4% were weight related.
And, before you question my mathematical prowess, the percentage is higher than one hundred because many people have multiple resolutions.
The same research shows that 25% of people who made these resolutions lost steam just seven days later. In fact quite ironically, there is a movement of the disillusioned, who fete the 17th of January each year, as the Ditch Your Resolution Day.
There is scientific evidence as to why people struggle with resolutions. Last week, in my column, I referred to something called the “false hope syndrome”.
This term stems from the extensive research done by psychologists, led by Professor Janet Polivy at the University of Toronto about two decades ago.
It seems that we all have unrealistic expectations about our ability to change.
Their research indicates that people appear to behave paradoxically, by persisting in repeated "self-change" attempts, despite previous failures.
Sounds familiar?
You always feel better when you fix goals, or establish resolutions. Once you convince yourself that you are on it, you start with great optimism.
Often, you set naive expectations concerning the ease, and speed with which you hope to achieve your target and this serves to cloud your own judgement on your prior failings.
I must admit that I have first-hand experience with “false hope syndrome”.
I am by nature a positive fellow, and quite easily excitable. Therefore, even a passing notion might trigger off a business idea in my mind. In the past, this regularly led to me taking off on a crusade to launch a new project.
And, some of these endeavours were slightly overzealous adventures that fell short of my good intentions. Sustainable enterprises require in depth exploration. But, when I was overcome by this syndrome, I had unreasonable audacity.
By learning from my mistakes, I have been able to taper this tendency down, dramatically.
For many of you, this psychological condition, will impact your ability to sustain any resolution you might attempt to make for the year ahead.
Therefore, I suggest that you think very deeply about how to distinguish the feasible resolutions against the impossible self-change goals. This way you will avoid over-confidence and false hopes that will surely lead to eventual failure, and distress.
How can you do this?
I recommend two important tests that you need to apply to your resolutions.
The first is to ask yourself if your resolution has true meaning for you. Remember that in order for a resolution to stick, it has to be aligned with your core values. It also has to hold a deep personal meaning that allows you to connect with it at an emotional level.
I was able to resolve to not jump at every opportunity that passed my way, only when it truly resonated with me. I was able to connect emotionally to the fact that each time I overenthusiastically plunged into a new venture, there were real consequences for my financial health, and the sustainability of my existing businesses.
This connection had to be strong, for me to keep to that resolution.
The next is that you must ask yourself if your resolution is overambitious. I know that we live in a “go-big or go-home” era. But your resolution cannot be naive.
Take the founder of Facebook, Mark Zuckerberg, as an example.
In January 2016, he declared in a post that he had made a resolution to run 365 miles that yea r, the equivalent of over 10 marathons. That sounded overly ambitious, at first glance.
But then, he pointed out that 365 miles is just one mile per day. And it took only 10 to 12 minutes of daily running, to do this. He broke down his goal into realistic bite-sized chunks.
On the 15th of July 2016, some 5 months ahead of target, Zuckerberg posted that he had achieved his resolution of running 365 miles. Now, this is how successful people keep their resolve.
So, before you dive head first in making your New Year’s resolutions, be sure you have an emotional connection with them, and see if you can break them down to doable portions.
Shankar R. Santhiram is managing consultant and executive leadership coach at EQTD Consulting. He is also the author of the national bestseller “So, You Want To Get Promoted?”