STANDING in the kitchen, shaving off what was left of her hair, the reality of her situation sunk in for Hiba Abdul Rahman.
As she was close to breaking down from seeing clumps of her shoulder-length hair on the floor, she noticed her one-year-old niece peering at her nervously. The child was confused by Hiba's new appearance.
"It's Aunty Hiba !," she said reassuringly to the toddler, whose face immediately lit up in recognition at her beloved aunt's voice.
That moment brought a realisation to Hiba, a breast cancer survivor who was diagnosed when she was just 25 years old. She made up her mind to accept and appreciate the new person she had become and even "rock" her bald look from chemotherapy.
At 25, when her peers were building careers or starting families, Hiba had to face up to a stage 2 diagnosis of breast cancer, losing a breast and undergoing the full gamut of treatment — from chemotherapy and radiotherapy to targeted therapy and hormone therapy.
Hiba has been cancer-free for nine years and is looking forward to marking her 10th anniversary soon.
But the journey hasn't been without pitfalls.
She recalls the extreme side effects of treatment which left her with memory loss, the inability to focus, insomnia, extreme pain which left her bed bound, and the weight gain that came from the strong steroids.
"Once, I was sitting at the table and dropped a fork. I was completely startled because I didn't even realise I was holding a fork. My sister told me I had picked up a fork to eat," says Hiba, adding that the memory loss and inability to focus also meant that she was frequently repeating things.
It was a difficult time, not just for Hiba, but also her whole family. A month before her diagnosis, her father died and the family was still grieving his loss when news of Hiba's health condition came.
But they rallied around to support Hiba, the youngest of the siblings as she navigated her difficult cancer journey. Her friends stepped in to support her too.
"I'm thankful that whenever there was a difficult moment, there was someone there to stand beside me," says Hiba.
On her part, Hiba did whatever she could to get through cancer treatment, and the toll it takes on the mind and body.
"I'm a huge Harry Potter fan and I would wear my Harry Potter robe and hat to go for chemotherapy, and when I was completely bald, I hired a henna artist to draw on my head."
These fun, quirky moments helped her get through the challenges of cancer treatment.
But Hiba acknowledges that she will never be the same again and she "grieves" for the person she once was.
The transition from normal person to cancer patient, and then survivor, is going to change you in many ways, she explains and unless one grieves that loss, one can't move forward and bloom and grow into a new person.
Hiba refused breast reconstruction after her mastectomy despite her young age and has chosen to accept and live with the loss of her breast.
"Having two breasts doesn't make you a woman and having no breasts doesn't make you any less of a woman," she says confidently.
Her words are a reflection of the strong new person who has emerged from the tumultuous journey that started in her doctor's waiting room nine years ago.
WAKE-UP CALL
Dr Kartini Kamalul Ariffin, an entrepreneur and former TV host, also acknowledges that cancer was a wake-up call for her.
She went to see her doctor after finding a lump in her breast while showering. Diagnosed in February 2023 with stage 1 breast cancer, her world came to a halt.
She experienced the whole gamut of emotions that follow a cancer diagnosis, starting with shock and denial.
Her mind went into self doubt and self blame. She kept asking herself why it had to happen to her and if she could have done anything to prevent it.
The news was all the more shocking because she had had a mammogram only 11 months before which had given her the all-clear.
"I was adamant about seeking answers, but that left me stuck because I didn't get an answer and never did."
Eventually, she realised she had to stop looking for the reason.
Cancer doesn't discriminate, she says and we will never fully understand why one person gets it and another doesn't. The thought of her children growing up without a mother spurred her to embrace care and treatment instead of dwelling on the reasons behind her diagnosis.
As she stepped into treatment, the family's routine changed too.
When Kartini was undergoing radiotherapy, weekend family outings switched from the usual malls or theme parks to the hospital.
They would have lunch at the hospital and sometimes, ice cream after her sessions. It became a new way for the family to bond.
Kartini realised how strong her children were and their resilience in facing up to her diagnosis surprised her. All too often, we underestimate children and what they can handle, she adds.
As she journeyed through treatment, she also acquired a deeper commitment to spirituality.
"This journey has strengthened my faith and my connection to my creator and that has become the theme of my life now. I trust and surrender to God."
SUPPORTING EARLY DETECTION
IN conjunction with Breast Cancer Awareness Month, Nivea, in partnership with Watsons, has kickstarted the 'Moments of CARE' initiative, pledging to
donate RM50,000 to the Breast Cancer Welfare Association Malaysia (BCWA).
With breast cancer being the most prevalent cancer among Malaysian women, affecting 1 in 19, this initiative is pivotal in promoting early detection and self-care.
As part of the campaign, Nivea has organised an exclusive workshop led by qualified doctors and nurses for the general public, covering breast cancer topics such as early detection, common early signs, and self-examination, with free breast cancer screenings for participants.
For more information about the "Moments of CARE" campaign, please visit www.nivea.com.my