In an interview recently, renowned motivational speaker Nick Vujicic, who was in town for the Success 2016 programme, spoke of the importance of having faith in God and strengthening family ties.
Question: You have had many successes but what is your ultimate dream achievement?
Answer: My biggest desire is to talk about my faith. There are venues where I’m not allowed to talk about it so much. I put faith in my speeches because without the mention of God, my story is not in its entirety.
I want everyone to understand that hope is when you really believe that you can overcome the biggest disability, which is death. Now that my father believes in heaven, he knows that his illness (pancreatic cancer) is not the end. When you have a hope that surpasses death itself, that’s when you have a hope which is unstoppable.
Question: How has family life changed you?
Answer: From being a single person to knowing who you are going to marry is a huge difference. Many people say I am a strong person as a motivational speaker, but I have my ups and downs. In fact I had taken up a bit too much and lost all my money in December 2010. When I told my wife, she told me not to worry and that she would get a job to support us both. That was when I knew she was going to be the one who will love me, be by my side and will never leave me.
Marriage is hard, but there are many amazing blessings within it. Communication is important between a husband and a wife. If I take my handphone to the dining table, my wife will put it on the highest shelf where I can’t reach because when I am home, I am home. I want my mind and heart to be there, too, not still at work.
Raising a son is such a big responsibility and it changes even more so with a second child. I am travelling a lot less now, too. Last year, I travelled for 22 weeks. This year, 19 weeks and next year, 14 weeks. I love being a husband and a father more than I love being a speaker.
I have spoken to billions of people and now I need to get more creative on how to reach others without leaving home.
I need to think strategically and use technology to its fullest. So, instead of me going around the world, I want to go live on television. I want maximum impact in minimum time.
Question: Do you have any advice for those who work hard to provide for their families, but find that they are not spending enough time with their children?
Answer: It’s very hard to find a good balance between work and family, but you have to make sure your children know you’re putting in the effort.
Find time within the week for quality time with your children, who each would want to communicate with you differently than their siblings. You have to figure out what each of their love language is.
Secondly, make those quality times so good that the only thing they remember is the times they spent with Dad instead of when Dad is not home.
Thirdly, you need to ask whether you are working too hard. Would it be okay to back off a little bit on your job and get a little less money, but keep your quality of life?
The highest suicide rate is in North Asia, where it’s culturally acceptable for a father to work all the time so their children could go to the best universities. I believe it’s better for my children to not go to the top universities, but have a father in their lives. Money is important but it’s not everything; family is.
Question: What is your advice for those who do not have the support of their families in achieving their dreams?
Answer: For this type, faith is important. The order of importance for me is faith, family and friends. If my father had not been a good role model, I knew God’s love never changes and that gives me strength throughout the day. Actually, my parents were very loving, but I still attempted suicide at age 10 because of my own oppression.
Secondly, give yourself a chance. You don’t know what beautiful things can come from your broken pieces until you give them a chance.
Next, try to help someone else. Take the focus off yourself and try help somebody else’s day get better. We make things better by smiling at somebody, lend an ear and encourage them. I would not have become a speaker travelling around the world if I wasn’t courageous enough to take the small step of talking to the people in my neighbourhood about hope. So, take baby steps and keep going because you never know, even if you don’t get a miracle, you can still be a miracle to someone else.
Question: How do you view successful people?
Answer: For me, it’s not about how successful they are, but how they carry themselves. There are people who look successful, but they are very egoistic and self-centred. We have to be humble. If one person thinks he or she is more important than others, that is when pride gets in the way. And pride limits your success — maybe not your bank account, but your relationship with those around you.
Question: Do you ever get tired of giving so much love to people?
Answer: When I feel tired and not capable of helping someone 100 per cent, I might be able to encourage them by crying with them, hugging them, checking in on them and praying with them. Sometimes, in the darkest of nights, all you need is a friend to check in on you.
I get very overwhelmed when I hear sad stories around the world. However, I have learned not to carry those burdens. If I can’t help, I pray for them and encourage them to go towards the right direction.
This world needs more love and I really believe that one of the things that we have yet to discover is the power of unity. This is where the Internet comes in. We have seen a lot of bad things through the Internet, but there have been some good things, too. One day we will see 400 million people giving US$1 a day and that alone can alleviate the suffering of humankind.
Question: You attempted suicide when you were 10. What changed your mind?
Answer: I didn’t want to leave my parents with the pain. It was their love that kept me here because I could not love myself then. If they were not verbally and physically affectionate, I think I would have ended my life.
Although I still felt alone because my parents did not know how it felt to not have limbs, I knew they were always there for me. They accepted me, were there for me even when they didn’t understand everything I went through. They prayed for me and I knew I was not alone. That knowledge was encouraging and gave me hope.
Question: How is your family coping with your father’s illness?
Answer: It was definitely shocking to learn that my father had pancreatic cancer, but we are thankful that we can at least say goodbye. Many people lost their loved ones and were unable to say goodbye.
We don’t know how long my father has, but we are making the most of it and it has brought the family close.
This reminds us that life will fade away, but if we believe in heaven, we will understand that this is just a glimpse of something really beautiful, where there is no pain and sickness. Every time I leave my father’s side, I will say: “Hey, I’m going to these countries to speak and if I don’t see you again here, I’ll see you up there.” That is the beautiful thing about having hope.