A LOCAL radio station recently mentioned a proverb in Malay, "adat orang muda menanggung rindu, adat orang tua menahan ragam". It can be loosely translated as "The customs of young people bear the longing, the customs of old people withstand variety".
This saying describes the art of the soul or character of young people; where old people as parents or guardians need to be patient and tolerant.
The meaning of the proverb might be directly related to the custom of young people dreaming of love. In this case, parents should be patient and accept the various actions of their children.
To me, this proverb does not only demonstrate parental patience with young people's actions or behaviour. But, more importantly, it shows that young people have many aspirations and endurances that need to be wisely directed and guided.
One important value a parent needs to pass on to the children is patience. As children, we are often told that patience is a virtue. But we are not usually taught why.
Arguably one of life's most important abilities, patience determines whether the commute home, a wait in line or a social situation are enjoyable or difficult.
As youngsters, we were probably at our most frustrated when we could not get what we wanted right away. As a result, we easily get angry, and tantrums occur.
At some point in our lives, we have been told to "be patient!" by parents, teachers, and other authority figures. But we do not recall being explicitly taught how to be patient.
Perhaps, our impatience as a youngster has been passed on to us as adults. Among the common occurrences are drivers losing their cool in traffic, online users judging before reading the entire post, and a slow Internet connection irritating us.
In the developing world of instant gratification, our expectation of rapid outcomes is pouring into every part of our lives.
We live in a time when stores can provide same-day delivery, movies and TV episodes can be streamed in seconds, and smartphone applications may greatly reduce or eliminate the need to wait for a date, or a reservation at our favourite restaurant.
As a result, we become more impatient. We are raised in such a way that we learn and strengthen our concentration on accomplishing or attaining our desired outcomes. Our society instils in us the belief that to be happy we must reach specific goals.
This culture of expectations, which places a timetable on everything in our lives, is incompatible with patience.
Therefore, patience is just the desire to live life at the pace at which it unfolds, whereas impatience is constantly stabbed at the impossible.
Consider the procedures we go through when we are impatient. When we are stuck in congested traffic, we are irritated that it does not move faster. When we are sitting through a tedious job presentation, we are wondering when it will end.
Moreover, we become upset when we are informed that something has been delayed. These reactions lead us to focus on our expectations of how things should be, rather than our existing reality. Getting irritated while waiting does not make the queue or traffic move faster, but it does make it more unpleasant to be in that scenario.
So, is patience really a virtue? I would say it is. It can be argued that patience is the ability to accept or tolerate delays, difficulties, or suffering without becoming irritated or furious. We can concentrate on improving our patience and engage in practices to help us become more patient.
Patience, or impatience, is a reaction to a problem or a delay in life that does not proceed as planned. We can scarcely go through a day without encountering anything that disrupts our goals. Thus, we may argue that interferences or disruptions are a natural part of life; expecting otherwise will make patience impossible.
While mastering the art of patience takes time and effort, there are numerous advantages to becoming a more patient person. Patience will help us become physically healthier. Impatience often leads to tension and rage, which are linked to a variety of physical stress-related disorders.
Furthermore, patience aids in the development of a positive mindset. Being dissatisfied, irritable, focusing on the negative, and finally feeling that nothing ever seems to go our way are all symptoms of a lack of patience.
More importantly, patience improves our ability to accept setbacks and increases our enjoyment of life. As a saying goes, "Good things come to those who wait".
Students need to be patient in learning and not chase grades instantly. Online traders need to be patient to analyse the data and not be greedy.
Thus, patience enables us to endure and make better-informed judgements, which can lead to greater success. Remember that patience allows us to slow down and appreciate the good things in our life.
The writer teaches at the School of Education and Modern Languages, Universiti Utara Malaysia