KUANTAN: Sacrificing his four-decade-long career for the sake of the family, that is exactly what 'superhero dad' Ramli Mamat did to take care of his wheelchair-bound wife and disabled son.
The 60-year-old quit his job as a cleaner at a resort in Cherating in 2022 to allow him to remain at home and look after the needs of his wife Murni Md Daud and son Mohammad Arif Hakimi, 22.
Murni, 59, has advanced arthritis which has restricted her movements over the past six years while Arif Hakimi, who has an intellectual disability, also suffers from elephantiasis, a condition that caused his left leg to swell and resulted in him to be partially blind.
The couple's fifth child Nor Aliah Safiah, 24, is deaf and mute but went on to complete her diploma in culinary studies and now works at a resort near here.
Met at his house in Kampung Bukit Palas near Cherating here, Ramli was feeding Arif Hakimi biscuits at their house porch accompanied by Murni, who was in a wheelchair.
The father-of-six said since Arif Hakimi is unable to speak normally, it is his responsibility to ensure his son does not go hungry and his adult diapers are always dry, and clean.
He said he left his job, which he held since the 1980s, as he felt he needed to care for his wife and son.
Murni, he said, was formerly a Kemas (Community Development Department) teacher. She stopped working in 2019 after her condition worsened.
"The arthritis meant she couldn't walk and was bedridden. She needs someone to take care of her.
"As for our son, since he is unable to speak, he would touch his stomach or cry out loudly when he hungry or requiring attention such as changing his diapers," he said.
Ramli said his daily routine begins at 6am with preparing breakfast for Arif Hakimi, giving him a bath and changing his clothes before feeding him his meals.
"My daughter, who lives nearby, would usually drop by to help cook and sometimes I prepare simple meals. Since my wife can move around on the wheelchair, I only assist her when she needs to sit up from the bed or use the washroom," Ramli said, adding he seldom leaves the house and ensures that someone is at home when he has to go out.
Ramli admitted that he sometimes felt down when thinking about his former career, especially when meeting former colleagues.
"I became a gardener in the 1980s and my first salary was around RM220. However, my priority now is my family, especially Arif Hakimi....it is my responsibility as a father to take care of him.
"I agree it is tiring and sometimes I am under stress especially when I suffer from lack of sleep but never regarded my son as someone with a disability. I see him as a normal person...we are more like close friends," he said.
Ramli said when he quit his job, he used his Employees Provident Fund (EPF) savings to manage the household.
He said several kind souls had also assisted after learning of the situation.
"Each month, I plan a budget for the medical and household expenses so that I do not face any financial trouble," said Ramli, who also receives monthly aid from the Pahang Islamic Religious and Malay Customs Council, and Welfare Department.
On Nor Aliah Safiah, Ramli said he learnt to communicate with her using sign language. Mobile phones, he said, had made it even easier.
"She is independent and adventurous. After completing her studies at a special education school in Indera Mahkota here, she furthered her studies at a vocational school in Penang and completed her diploma at a community college in Selangor," he said.
Ramli hoped that when he is no longer around, his other children will take over and care for Arif Hakimi.
"The children must take care of their youngest brother and my wife."
Caption:
1. Ramli Mamat (in yellow) with his son Mohammad Arif Hakimi while his wife, Murni Md Daud, looks on at their house in Kampung Bukit Palas near Cherating here.